I seem to have left my pride at pride
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Randomize