hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
