Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I need help removing her.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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