You just made me feel so damn special
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
