Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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