I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
