physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Randomize
