i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
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