i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
