Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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