the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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