Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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