Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
