hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
