Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
