I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
