He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize