we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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