we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
