She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
