we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
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