The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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