i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
you didnt know i had herpes?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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