Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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