She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
