whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
