I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
