what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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