how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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