Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
