Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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