I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I use my feet as sexual weapons
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
