woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
