whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
