If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
