i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
