im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
