Me too!
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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