also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
