so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I am available for nakedness
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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