i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
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