The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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