omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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