you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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