your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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