The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
