thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
