I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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