yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
This is classic penis vs brain.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
A+ Viking dick
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
