I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize
